Thinking Out Loud

Project Happily Ever After

I’ve been following Alisa Bowman’s blog,, for several months. A couple who came to see me at a very low point in their marriage told me about the site. Between our first and second sessions, they “googled” their problem and Project Happily Ever After appeared in the search. After exploring the site, their comment to me went something like this: “She’s writing about exactly what we’re going through.” Read More

Discouraging Honesty

Two people in the news this past week were fired from their jobs for being honest—and human. One was a journalist, the other a Department of Agriculture official in Georgia. Both were honest and open in their public comments with good intentions and clear purpose. Read More

Dangerous Interpretations

I listened to part of Weekend Edition this past Sunday on NPR and heard the letters-to-the-editor segment. Some of the letters referenced a story last weekend about PTSD in military personnel. The letters criticized someone interviewed who used the term, “former veterans.” Read More

Name Calling

What child hasn’t been scolded for calling someone names? They are admonished: That’s not nice. . . . We don’t call others names. . . . Tell him you’re sorry for calling him names. We use these and other familiar phrases to try to teach our children how to behave properly and respectfully in a civil society. Calling others names is character attack. To say, “You are an idiot,” classifies the other, is not specific about your objections/concerns, and invites defensiveness. In short, it is bad communication practice. Read More