Thinking Out Loud

What child hasn’t been scolded for calling someone names? They are admonished: That’s not nice. . . . We don’t call others names. . . . Tell him you’re sorry for calling him names. We use these and other familiar phrases to try to teach our children how to behave properly and respectfully in a civil society. Calling others names is character attack. To say, “You are an idiot,” classifies the other, is not specific about your objections/concerns, and invites defensiveness. In short, it is bad communication practice. Read More

During the Winter Olympics, there was a lot of hype about the US/Canadian hockey rivalry. I heard a news report contrasting how citizens of each country spoke about the upcoming game. The point of the report (which was done with humor) demonstrated how Canadians spoke more respectfully about the opponent, whereas Americans were more likely to engage in “trash talk.” A Canadian, for example, might say they were going to win but would also wish the US team good luck. Most Americans who were interviewed found some way of aggressively expressing US superiority. Read More

The world of childhood seems far away to some, and yet to others is so accessible. We were all once children, but when we cross the divide into adulthood, our memories reconfigure. For some the connection to childhood, and thus to children is very natural. Others find it foreign and awkward. Connecting to and communicating with kids, and being comfortable in their presence can be confusing. Read More